Nearly Two Years Ago…

For the better part of two years I have had this blog. There are some bits of sensitive information about me that are written here as well as some lessons I have learned. However, like every other human being, I am imperfect. This is a post about my goals that I have competed, failed, and those that remain unclear. In good form, I’ll start with the negative!

The Failures

I haven’t kept up my blog. It isn’t that I haven’t been able to, looking back on an average day I waste hours doing nothing constructive. I work, but I don’t work so much I can’t crank out a few sentences. I go to school, but I don’t go for so long that I can’t read my subscriptions. This is a character flaw, one that I am still struggling to overcome.

I haven’t kept up my physical fitness. I joined a gym at the end of spring called Fitness USA. I went regularly and even got a personal trainer there for nearly three months. At that point, this particular location shut down and I was transferred to another gym. Since then I haven’t had the motivation to use this new place near as much. This is me being a baby. There is no excuse. I will work to correct this immediately.

The Success

So far I have stayed in school for what is just over a full year now. I have been working to help pay for college as well as using my loans. This is something I had never seen myself doing until just a year ago. I’m proud of myself no matter how horrible of a student I am. I am succeeding and getting on track.

I have also kept my friends close. While some have moved away for the time being, we always make best of what time we have together. My group of friends is close knit and I am all too thankful for this, we have helped each other so much over the years. While I have let some get distanced, I don’t plan to keep it like that. Everyone is important to me and I won’t let go.

What About This Unclear Business?

Oh I’ll let you know about this business. While I have been at work in college, I still can’t decide between two career choices. The side of me I don’t like so much keeps pushing for a license in nursing. This is a logical decision as the nursing field would treat me with preference, I’d be working with lots of women (smileyface), and the money would be much better.

However, what I truly feel I would enjoy and appreciate is social work. One thing that has always stuck with me since I was a teen is that I want to give back. I want to be able to help people, children in particular. While these times are possibly the most confusing and hardest for any child, there are some that have truly desperate situations. I want to be able to help. Every time I battle this in my head social work comes out on top. I need to make the change now. This is a struggle for many people.

“Am I supposed to work to make a living?”

“Is the money truly worth it?”

“How would I live off of such a low salary?”

Actually, writing it out is therapeutic because I feel that this next statement truly shows what I feel. I never thought of this before but what if…

“I enjoy what I do regardless of money. I help other people enjoy their lives. I don’t live off of the money I make, I live off of the joy I create. I work for the people.”

That’s what I hear inside me.

Until next time.